Tisk, tiskkk!

Oh dear!
Well first off, I got to 107 again. And binged, AGAIN. Luckily I was able to purge. Bad news? I went out drinking with my sister last night and her car broke down! And of course we decided to give these guys a ride home because they missed their cab and where going to pay us 40 dollars for a ride that was quite simply right down the street. Needless to say, we didn't get back to her apartment until 3:30AM. And she made french toast with eggs - I couldn't resist! Never can when I'm not sober. I was pretty pissed at myself because I had FINALLy reached 107 and messed it all up again. I seriously repeated the same mistake; that's really what gets me the most about the whole thing. So I cam home this morning to weight myself and somehow I was still 107. I, no joke, dropped to my knees thanking God for such a wonderful miracle.

And I went pretty much the whole day without eating. Until I got home. ANNNND let's just say it was all downhill from there. Binged, tried to purge, and am very sure I didn't get even half of the enormous food I ate up. I am still going to be positive about this though. I mean I was able to get some up, which is obviously better than none. Not to mention, I have a looong work day tomorrow so I will definitely need the energy for tomorrow. I also needed a good slap in the face with some motivation. All in all, I don't think I gained too much. I have decided I'm going to not weight myself until Sunday night; I don't want to ruin any motivation with anger towards myself. For further motivation Sunday will also be the day when I shall post some progress pictures up to reassure that I stick to it! I'm really having a hard time with not purging lately which really is no good :( I've got to figure a way to help myself from doing it so if anyone has suggestions I would absolutely love them!

Sorry to sound like such a failure with restriction lately. I feel like I've let myself as well as all you girls out there down; it was not my intention. I'll make it up to everyone, myself included, by Sunday. That's a promise!